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At Least It's Not Cancer

Wednesday night Allison and I went to see Crazy Stupid Love.  First of all it was a great movie--you should really see it.  I laughed, I cried, I laughed and cried some more.  It was one of the best movies I've seen in a while (and I've watched about 20 movies in the last month).

If you've seen the previews, on TV or in the movies, you know Julianna Moore's character, Emily asks her husband Cal, played by Steve Carell for a divorce.  One scene shows Cal in his office.  A co-worker comes in and says that someone heard him crying in the bathroom.  Cal then tells the coworker that he is getting a divorce.  The coworker looks relieved and says "Oh we thought it was cancer."  Cal sarcastically says that it's only his relationship.  Coworker tells him to look on the bright side, at least it's not cancer.

This is the part were Allison leans over and says "that's one way we could look at, it's not cancer just break ups."

This got me wondering.  Why do we treat break ups like they're cancer, or something far worse?  None of my relationships have last very long., but when they ended I was devastated.  Looking back I'm not really certain why I acted in such a way.  Sometimes a break up is a good thing.  Sometimes something good comes out of a break up.

One story comes to mind.   Let's travel back in time to 2010.

I dated "Mullet" (so nicknamed for his lovely choice of hairstyles.  Why he thought it was acceptable to have business in the front, party in the back I'll never know.) for six months.  Now, Mullet wasn't the typical guy I would pick out as "my type" but I was crazy about him none the less.  Things got a little serious, he got a little scared and disconnected so I thought it would be best to end the relationship.  I was crushed.  I cried and cried and cried until I honestly didn't think I could cry anymore.  And although I thought I couldn't, I did cry more.  I cried a lot.  I honestly cried almost everyday for months.  A year later, I can say that was stupid.  It was a break up, not the end of the world.

I now realize that even though, at the time, I thought that breaking up with Mullet was the end of the world, it wasn't.  Life it went on.  Today, I can say that breaking up with him was a good thing.  After all it was the break up that prompted my first road trip with Allison.  If Mullet and I hadn't broken up, I would have went to see Brooks and Dunn with him.  We probably would have drove to St. Louis the day of the concert, maybe go out to eat somewhere, found any automotive, home supply or tractor store we could and stop at them, go to the concert and drive home.  Instead I got to go with my friend.  We made it a weekend trip.  We went to the arch, a scary wax museum, the brewery, and out to eat at nice restaurants.  We went shopping, exploring, attempted to drive go-karts and went to the zoo, on top of seeing a great concert.  Now we've been to multiple concerts and trips to Nashville, Branson and Destin.   I can guarantee you if Mullet and I didn't call it quits, I wouldn't have my road trip buddy and my best friend.

My new goal in life is to treat every break-up, failed date, or rejection just as what it is.  I mean, it could be cancer.

 
In the Arch Aug. 2010

Ready for the St. Louis City Museum Aug. 2010

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